Short story: Driving against the sunrise (unedited)

Sunlight was just showing up on the horizon. Daybreak was about to happen and the clouds were holding back the sunrise for just a few more moments. It was a magical time of day. A world of different possible futures existed at that moment. Driving behind a windshield enclosed in a car it was like watching a painting. Things never really felt fully tangible during the morning commute. It happened every day. These things happened every day all over the country. Maybe this one was going to be the best ever or it might just be another in a long string of things that happened. Every little bit of color that appeared on the horizon took a second to process. It was something that should be magical, but it was just going to be gone. These things never lasted very long. Most of the time it happened without any appreciation or anybody documenting it for posterity. In some ways the moment was fleeting without purpose or necessity. Maybe this round of daybreak would be more impactful. Today just might be the day where things happened. It just might be the day where things turned around from promising to perfection.

Somebody in the distance was shouting, “next.” Maybe they were just shouting something that sounded like that word. It was really had to tell, but it was enough to make me wonder exactly what was going to be next. The day started off with a drive to work and from there it was mostly the same thing with different people every day. Sometimes you appreciate the routine and sometimes you start thinking that maybe more would be better. The idea of more remains powerful to some extent. Opening the door to what might be possible is highly dangerous in terms of potential disappointment. Imagination quickly can outpace the possible. Sometimes the things that are happen in your routine are good enough. They are not just past perfect or anything, but they are good enough to make a go out of it. That is the real questionable part of planning to move on and do something else. It really does discount the value of the things that are happening now. Comparing a vision of a perfect possible future to the contemporaneous value of the now means knowing the moment and the possible. Boiling it down to just that thought could be enough to help figure some things out. It might be a good roadmap for that type of consideration or it could just be a distraction from plunging forward with a single minded purpose that gets things done.

Most of the drive was now over and the sunrise still stood off to the side now. Turning down this road was enough to put the morning light show off to the side of the car. It was out of my main field of view. Maybe that was an analogy for something that should be apparent or maybe it was literally what happens when you turn down this road. Roads are build in a variety of directions and some of them go directions other than East or West. Parking would be easy enough at this hour. Maybe that first deep breath outside the confines of car would be full of the smell of fresh cut grass. It could be of something else entirely. Maybe some standing water from that ditch had built up a smell of some type over night. Either way at this point the sunrise no longer seemed to be drawing my attention. All of my thoughts were focused on that first breath. Pretty much the entire day now rested on the positive or negative value of that moment. Sure that might seem like a reach, but it was about to happen. It was about to happen with one good pull on the car door handle…

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